Here’s the two minute review on the new Hawaii Five-0 series.

I’m ambivalent about it. On the one hand, Scott Caan has proven that he’s a much better actor than you probably realized. He’s extremely funny and steals every scene that he’s in. On the other hand, Alex O’Loughlin is just a drab action hero type. The straight man in a buddy cop show doesn’t have to be a total stiff–shouldn’t be a total stiff, to be sure. Lethal Weapon taught us that.

Also, there were a bunch of things that bugged me, starting almost immediately at the point that the main character, played by O’Loughlin, returns to Hawaii and the governor attempts to recruit him to lead some sort of task force she wants to put together. She tells him that she has talked to his superiors and they all say he’s “the best they’ve ever seen.” Can anybody in television or movies ever not be the best everybody has ever seen? Isn’t it good enough that the guy was just a Navy Seal? Aren’t all of these dudes ubermenschen?

Then of course you’ve got this task force, itself, which operates somewhere above the law, meaning that they can pretty much do whatever they want and the writers can hand-wave the many liberties the characters will be taking with their policemen constantly violating due process.

And one more quick thing…can we please get Grace Park to put on about ten pounds? She looks like an anorexic. There’s a scene in the pilot in which she’s forced to take off her dress by some bad guys, and I suppose this is meant to be titillating (of course, we’ve already seen her in a skimpy bikini, so it’s nothing new, really), except that it’s not…because Grace Park looks as though she could be broken in half by a strong breeze.  Which wouldn’t even be quite as annoying if she weren’t made out to be some sort of hardcore ass-kicker. It’s really difficult for me to buy this waif punching big, strong guys in the face.

The picture at right is actually sort of flattering–in other shots, you can count her ribs, and when she turns to the side, she almost disappears.

I’m not going to watch a second episode, but all of that said, it wasn’t the worst thing I’ve ever seen by any means. I’d score it somewhere in the middle.

Just to mention it, there was one stunt that actually made me say, “Whoah” out loud–mostly because it was actually performed by O’Loughlin. It happens about half-way in while they’re chasing some bad guy and O’Loughlin does a hand plant on the trunk of a car to hurdle over it at the same time that another car crashes into the back of said car. Pretty slick. I have no idea how they pulled that off in a remotely safe way.