Boba Fett survived falling into the stomach of the Sarlacc.

But the Sarlacc could never hold Fett. After conversing with a fellow captive, the Choi known as Susejo, Fett discovered that this being was actually psychologically connected to the Sarlacc—and it was this advantage that he used to goad the creature into contracting around his jet pack, igniting the device and providing his means of escape, killing the Sarlacc in the process. The resulting explosion, combined with the beast’s acidic stomach juices, left Fett on the verge of death. As he lay dying on the surface of Tatooine, his colleague Dengar was searching for anything valuable left from the explosion, but found Boba Fett instead, and nursed him back to health.

To be honest about this one, I don’t know how I feel. On the surface, it seems pretty stupid, and it kind of makes sense to me why George Lucas now seems to view the Expanded Universe as some sort of alternate reality from his movies (some people might say a better reality, but I’m still a big fan of the narrative of all six parts).

But then again, I guess if anybody could survive getting eaten by the Sarlacc, it might as well be Boba Fett.

This next one is easily a million times stupider: Darth Maul survived getting bisected by Obi-Wan Kenobi.

As it turns out, Maul somehow survived his bisection and subsequent fall into the reactor shaft on Naboo. Fitted with cybernetic legs, he began a vicious hunt for the only person to have defeated him; Obi-Wan Kenobi. He hunted the Jedi for many years, always being but a step behind him until 16 BBY when he discovered Owen Lars and a toddler-age Luke Skywalker.

This really needs no elaboration. That’s as stupid as the stupidest fan fiction.