6 Comments

  • fuwalda says:

    “Frank Langella‚Äôs character was an NSA employee who was struck by lightning and somehow got some sort of extra-terrestrial intelligence beamed into his head.”

    That’s just about the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.

  • Justin Garrett Blum says:

    I found out later it’s a film by the same guy who did Donnie Darko…and that makes sense. The science fiction elements of The Box were just uninteresting to me, and frankly, felt completely out of place in the story. I swear, there were whole plot points that were never even really explained and really had nothing at all to do with the central drama.

    I didn’t like Donnie Darko, but even if you did, maybe you can understand how this guy could make a really dumb, indulgent film.

  • fuwalda says:

    Donnie Darko was a dumb, indulgent film. That’s one of those films that people love, and I’ll never understand why. It sucked. This movie looked stupid too.

    Like you said, anybody who would press the button is a dick, so the trailer for this movie never interested me. Why would I watch a movie that is centered around a moral dilemma that even a four year old wouldn’t have trouble resolving? Just don’t press the button. I’m not saying there aren’t people out there who won’t press the button. I’m simply saying that I don’t want to watch a movie about those people.

    And it’s a shame because that movie has a really cool cast. When is that guy from X-Men going to be in another good movie already? Also, Frank Langella may have the record for being the best actor who’s been in the most awful movies.

  • Justin Garrett Blum says:

    I’m glad somebody else is willing to say that Donnie Darko sucked.

  • fuwalda says:

    I’m offended to even share the same name as that movie.

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Spoilers: The Box

I’m going to call a spade a spade on this one and simply say that The Box was the most boring film that I’ve seen in a long time. In fact, it took me two attempts to make it through the film. Once, about a month ago, I tried and fell asleep after about a half an hour (my wife after about five minutes), and then last night, I finally picked it up about 45 minutes in and half-watched it through to the end.

Consequently, I’m not qualified to provide a legitimate review of this film, nor have I any desire to, really, since it’s hardly worth the time. Instead, I’ll merely spoil it for you below the “Read More”.

(more…)

1 Comment

  • fuwalda says:

    That’s the dumbest shit ever. Seriously? That’s the kind of cornball shit even O’Henry would’ve discarded for being too dumb. Then again, I haven’t seen the movie.

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Spoilers: A Single Man

I don’t really think anybody is going to be searching for the surprise ending to this film, but what the hell? I’ll post it anyway. (more…)

5 Comments

  • fuwalda says:

    Are you joking? The top fell over and then Leo went back and put it in his pocket. Then he looked at the camera and said, “Damn, it’s good to see my kids and stuff, but I still hate that they have the same disease as that little black kid from TV.” Then it faded to black. I didn’t like how Nolan left the ending so ambiguous. I mean, was he talking about Webster or Arnold from Diff’rent Strokes?

    I bet the projectionist f’ed up and ended the film too soon at your cinema.

  • fuwalda says:

    And then Joseph Gordon Levitt runs in and goes, “Dude, we’ve got another job. Lindsay Lohan’s mom wants us to get her off drinking.” And then Leo looks back at the camera, holds his palms up and goes, “Here we go again!” Then when the credits rolled, the music was that song Beth Barbush used to listen to that went “when I am dreaming I don’t know if I’m truly asleep or if I’m awake!”

    And did you stay until after the credits, bro? There was a little blink and you’ll miss it text crawl that said, “The Inceptors will return in Inception 2: Such Stuff as Dreams Are Made.”

  • fuwalda says:

    Yeah, I’m done. Sorry to highjack your post.

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Article

Spoilers: Inception

If you intend to see Christopher Nolan’s film Inception some day, then you probably will not want to continue through to rest of this post, in which I intend to succinctly spoil the ending.

You have been warned. (more…)

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Spoiler Alert

Here’s something I’ve been meaning to do for a while. I’m going to totally spoil the ending of films with final act twists. Don’t worry…I’ll hide the spoilers behind a “Read More” link.

It has been bothering me for a while that there isn’t really a good place to go to simply find out what happens at the end of a film that you don’t intend to ever see. For example, I’m curious about the twist ending of M. Night Shyamalan’s film The Happening, but not so much that I’m willing to actually sit through it. But when I do sit through such a film, I’ll just come here and spoil it for anybody who’d rather not spend their time.

(more…)
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